So I'm sitting here cold...dreading my Japanese exam, but knowing there's not much I can do about it, having studied quite a bit already...I just have to pray a lot and hope I guess.
I'm really frustrated that I've been failing lately at painting and writing poetry...I really thought being creative was something that came natural and easy..but maybe I'm wrong.
I'm also frustrated that all the classes I want to take next year are at the same time..I really don't know what I'm going to do. Lay out index cards in a giant schedule and throw together something that works I suppose. Oh choices...such a hard thing to do.
I just realized that no guy would probably ever be interested me. And sadly I realized today, while I like the idea of being in love and in a relationship, I'm just not genuinely interested.
I just wonder if he feels the same way. I doubt he'll be able to hold out for long, seeing as he's a guy with biological desires stronger than mine by nature. But I suppose at this point I'm so tired of it, maybe I should have a little faith in him after all...Ugh. I wonder why I'm even bothering to hope sometimes though..
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