I don't know

I hate feeling like I can't do anything for my friends.

I hate not being loved by the one person I care about the most anymore.

I hate calling out ofr help and not being heard. And I hate being scared to call out in the first place.

I hate all these feelings inside...But most of all, I hate the emptiness.

It's not that I'm not grateful for what you have done. I am happy to have lived a life where
you were there. And I'm happy for everything you've given me.

If I do die...I wish that I could become a guardian angel. So that I can be all that I never was in this life. So I can do more than I ever could in this life, for those who I love.

So I can protect you. And be by your side.

Forever.